Keys To Surviving Your 21st Birthday

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It’s fair to say that turning 21 is one of the most exciting life events in your time. I remember having butterflies in my stomach the morning of when I drove to the tanning salon to get a spray tan (side note: never get a spray tan the day of your event, only day the salon could book me…. fucks). I knew I was going to come back from Atlantic City with my friends the next day feeling different.

The Time Has Come

21st BirthdayClick to Enlarge

It kind of felt like that eerie, anxious feeling that you get when you’re getting ready for your senior prom…you knew it was going to be a night to remember (although most of us won’t remember it at all). Call me an overly enthusiastic alcoholic but it is a great fucking day. After that celebration with your best friends at midnight you are finally able to drink legally. No fake IDS. No memorizing false identities. No awkward sly faces when you hand your license to the bouncer (even though for some reason we feel awkward about it after we’re legalized).

Get Wasted And Enjoy Your 21st

The point is to get trashed, but don’t make dumb mistakes like trying to leave with a 40-year-old man who is wearing an Eagles hat…no drunk girls, he’s not an Eagles player, he’s just wearing his favorite team’s hat. This is it, so live it up. Just do it fucking right for god’s sake.

Shame

Popfeer’s 6 Keys to Surviving Your 21st Birthday

  • EAT SOMETHING. I don’t care how slutty and tiny the dress you are wearing the night of is. If you don’t eat a decent meal before the party you will get drunk so easily, it won’t be fun for you or the people you are celebrating with. Starve yourself up until the day of and then eat dinner before you go if you need to…. (Not that I condone that behavior or anything ;))
  • Have someone else drive. If you’re going to a destination spot don’t be the person to drive even if you’re staying at a hotel. You will be so hungover the next morning that you won’t be able to drive in a straight line, let alone walk in one. Be safe, and don’t get hit by a bus.
  • Drink moderately at the pregame. So many people start pounding shots at 7 pm and don’t make it to the midnight toast. You want to be coherent for that, that’s the fun part. That’s the moment when you realize your life will never be the same again. Plus your drunk friends will make some pretty incredible toasts that you’ll want to make fun of them for later.
  • Get drunk at the club. Or bar, or house party if you’re being lame. Wait until you are in the setting of the designated celebration area before you start getting trashed. Oh and trust me, it’s easy to get drunk on your 21st Strangers will buy you shots simply because of the occasion. Everyone wants you to get drunk.
  • Have a friend (the one that is the mom of the group) take your phone and your wallet when you look like you can’t walk in a straight line anymore. That moment when you wake up and realize that your phone is attached to the charger in the wall and not lodged behind the toilet in the club bathroom is a fantastic feeling.
  • Roll a blunt. There is no better hangover cure than weed (and IB profin). Spark up a fat one on your way back to your college apartment. Hey, but if you get caught don’t blame me…. I didn’t put a gun to your head or anything.

Happy birthday you old ass fucks.

Comment below and let us know if our survival keys helped you on your 21st birthday.

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